When you are at the point of self harming there seems there is no other way out. Here at The Living Room we know there are other ways of coping with these feelings.

There are many reasons that people self harm, feelings of uncontrollable rage, feeling trapped & helpless, feelings of guilt & shame that become unbearable, feelings of being ‘detached’ from the world & your body & wanting to ‘feel’ again. History of abuse & sexual abuse. Some people can’t even put their finger on why.

To relieve such feelings of deep distress you may cut, burn, bite, hit yourself, pull your hair, stab yourself. The list goes on and you may become very adept at hiding this, as an alcoholic can ‘hide’ the amount they are drinking.

We are here to help and not to judge. We understand.

What’s the pay off?

You may feel more in control after self harming, it may give you a sense of calm for a while. You may be getting a ‘buzz’ not only from the act but also from the fact that you are doing this and no-one else knows about it. It may be that you need to express self hate and it’s proof of the depths of your distress. You may feel you are paying someone back for the distress they are causing you.

What’s the down side?

The injury marks or cuts become visible and you desperately try to cover them up. You have to find places on your body that you can cover with clothes, leading you to wear long sleeves, even in the summer and on holiday.

Self harm can stop you from getting the career you want e.g., if you wanted to join the army, R.A.F. or any career where your cuts may be on ‘show’.

When loved ones find out they don’t understand how you can do this to yourself. They become scared and try to get you to stop. This can make you feel guilt and shame. You may really want to stop, but find you can’t; just as an alcoholic cannot stop drinking, as they have become addicted to this way of coping. You may feel “if I have to stop this, how will I cope”.


To book an assessment call

0300 365 0304  (local call rate)    or    Get Help


If you are in immediate need, seek urgent help or call 111

If you just need to talk, call Samaritans on 116 123.

Find our more information on self-harm